Try to find myself some sleep at 11 something but couldn't sleep. Get off thee bed and grab some water and donuts. Sitting on the dinning table, thinking about something went wrong. Hearing the beep of the car outside my window, people screaming and talking at the same time. The aeroplane are on the sky, passing through the condo. Something whisper to my ear and talking to myself. Thinking *Am I crazy? Is this what I really want to happen? I'm gonna lose someone I love most! I'm done, I'm finish. My fairy tales end here.* What ls could go wrong? Spill a million tears. My fingers are shacking and my brain is thinking. Thinking about dialing the number that I should have done early just now. But I'm afraid that I might fall to the wrong steps and make it more worst. I keep crying and try to scream but my voice are not out. Starring outside the street, wondering what have I done all this year. Realize that I'm not good enough for a boy who adores me. Realize that I'm just a person who gets caught up in the past and always try to move out from the life. It's nothing but a failure. A failure to him, a failure to me too! Just that my hearts keep pumping like I'm scare. Scare of losing someone that's really important to me. I'm just afraid that I might fall again. Feet are cold enough as my body temperature starts to get lower, eyes turns to red. Thinking about him right now. >> In my mind was: Can I get him back? Is he having affair with other girl or not? Am I going to be his mrs. in the future or not? Could I go so far in this relationship? Question keep pops out in my mind, answer remains unknown. Heart says keep positive and hold your head up high. Pray for something better. started to cry as I start to think again about the good and bad. Cursing for the bad, pray for the good. Here comes my situation again, repeat all over :/